I feel very fat, and am planning a vigorous bike ride in a minute. Yes, I know half the world's starving and half the world bloats, and I should be happy that I can cram calories down my throat whenever I feel like it. But. I wish the calories would get stuck on my chest, rather than all ganging up and marching down onto my stomach and thighs. It's like a fat festival down there, with special appearances by cellulite and wobbly bits.

This was a nice surprise though. Zoe Ball introduced them, her ears are very prominent aren't they?