Ever had one of those headaches that seems to be coming out of your nose? They're not a pleasant experience.
Ever been quizzed at 8.30am by a hyperactive Nigerian boy over why you don't believe in God? It's quite painful.
Ever fallen in love with someone you shouldn't have fallen in love with? Sorry, that song is stuck in my head.
Ever worried that you dress like an angry teenager and that's why you get ID'd if you try and buy so much as a scratch card? Probably not.
Ever worried that you blog like an angry teenager, and that's why this post seems to have turned in one long turgid moan? It's possible.
Ever used a word and then had to check the dictionary to find out what it means? See above.
Ever heard Chinese pop music? It's really bad.
Ever tried to sit through the Hollyoaks omnibus? It's impossible.
Ever dressed a small dog up and made it dance? It's what they were invented for.
Ever managed to get back into a really good dream that you've woken up in the middle of? Just the once.
Ever thought this post was gonna end? Ta da!