Who's up for a night out at the eco nightclub? It looks like a bit of a laugh. Power up the dancefloor with a few enthusiastic groin thrusts. Knock back a couple of energy efficient vodkas. Totter to the toilets in a pair of vegetarian high heels. Just be careful not to get your carefully-styled hair caught in the wind turbine. That might be messy.

I tend to get rather agressive when drunk, so am pretty sure they could power the entire club with my mouth. All that's needed is an organic, ethically sourced falafel stand in place of the standard kebab shop. Oh, and the ability to cycle home at the end of the evening, rather than slither into a taxi and vomit up the content of your eco evening. Beause the driver will be scrubbing it off the seat with bleach, not Ecover, and you'll have to start reducing your carbon footprint all over again